Sex is the last thing a parent wants to hear coming out of their children’s mouth. It is a nightmare and an unwanted thought when thinking about your child and sex at the same time. As they get older, there are some curious thoughts that go through their mind. Frightening as it sounds; communication is the key between you and your child when it comes to sexuality. We as parents cannot be there for our children 24 hours a day, all we can do is instill some experience and knowledge into their minds and hope it guides them intellectually to the right decisions in life.
When you child approaches you about sex, take a deep breath, it can be an unnerving and an uncomfortable feeling… It’s not going to be easy at first, but in the end, you will feel better about talking about it. Ask your teen what lead them to ask you this question. If they tell you that someone they have interest in has brought it to their attention, then it is ok. Hopefully they have not done anything yet. With the way society is with our kids growing up in it, peer pressure can be a bit overwhelming and more likely some teens might give in to it.
Explain to them that their body is a precious temple, keeping it pure and maintaining their virginity is a very rare and special thing. State that even though they might be thinking about doing it; they are simply too young for such an experience and the best thing to do is to wait until they are older and more mature. Inform them that just because you have feelings for someone it doesn’t necessarily have to be any sexual involvement, that there are consequences when having sex and even though your teen might think they know all about it, there is always more to tell.
Unprotected sex can lead to you contracting a sexually transmitted disease, like gonorrhea that can cause inflammation of the genital mucous membrane, burning pain when urinating, and a discharge. It is caused by a gonococcus bacterium. Another disease to worry about is PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease) an inflammation of a woman’s reproductive organs in the pelvic area, which can cause infertility.
Syphilis is a serious sexually transmitted disease caused by the spirally twisted bacterium Treponema pallidum that affects many body organs and parts, including the genitals, brain, skin, and nervous tissue, and Chlamydia, which can cause infertility, chronic pain, or a tubal pregnancy if left untreated. Many diseases can be contracted with oral and sexual intercourse. Oral sex is not safe and you still can catch certain diseases in your mouth.
Love can be a cruel emotion. Let you child know that just because they feel strongly towards another person, it does not mean that their feeling are mutual. Sex can be the only issue with the other person; he or she could be out to use you for it. Help them to understand that if they are not willing to wait for the right time, then that person might not be such a good influence on them.
Motherhood is a hard job; a child simply cannot raise a child. They have plenty of time to grow up, get their education and then they can decide if being a parent is what they want. Life is so good; they should be able to enjoy it while they can without any setbacks. Sex is a way of two people showing their love for one another. It is not something to take lightly. Giving up your virginity is a very important choice and you should not be coursed into it.
Trust and communication is so crucial to you and your child’s relationship. Your child being able to come to you and talk to you about the most important things that are going on in their life is so necessary. Knowing how your child feels and what is going on in their life without being too concerned, makes an open and great relationship between you two.
If you think that your child might go that way, then talking to them about birth control is an option. Sometimes talking does some good, but not enough and they still might end up having intercourse. Just be safe, let them know about birth control methods to prevent pregnancy. It’s hard I know, but you rather educate them and be safe about it, then to do nothing at all.
Good luck, being a parent is hard work. We want the best for our babies, sometimes it is hard to separate the day they were born from the day that they became adults. We wish our children could stay the cute adorable babies that they once were. They have to grow up, there might be drama, rebellion, and a lot of hair in the sink, but in the end, we love unconditionally and appreciate every single moment.